Update: COSOM buys Evilspeak.org

I am happy to announce that COSOM has just purchased the premium domain name Evilspeak.org.

You read that correctly. MapSelf will no longer be hosting COSOM Online Ministry. It has found a better home, a home of its own, with a name that is actually related to its content.

Evilspeak.org was (formerly) the #1 Evilspeak fan forum. How did COSOM pull this off?

Frater Baal-Fred, wizard of cold calls, followed the following complex procedure:

  1. He called the site owner.
  2. He asked for the site using the following Scientology-grade hypo-chatter:

Hello. I represent a religious organization based on the movie worshipped by your fansite. We would like to buy it from you.

I spoke with FBF about his victory on the phone:

FBF: The owner, who goes by “Black Saint,” laughed and said that it was not for sale. First he thought it was a joke, and then he thought it was a prank—that I was one of his friends disguising his voice.

CSH: Sounds like a slow start. Then what?

FBF: Well, I was just calm. If you are super calm and friendly and not pushy, people’s natural pro-social wiring kicks in. It’s just a biological response. Your job is to emote the normalcy of the interaction, that socialization is normal and intrinsically pleasant. If you act like it’s fun, they won’t feel threatened. Also, acting nervous can also, especially in a sales or transactional context, appear as guilt—that you feel guilty about some forthcoming imposition or scam. The same goes for acting fake-friendly. Both are alarming. If you are uncomfortable, your listener will suspect that the coming climax is genuinely worry-worthy. Acting nervous can turn even a compliment into a threat.

CSH: Thank you for that deep analysis. Would you mind telling me how you put that into action?

FBF: I was calm and persistent and convinced him that I was serious.

CSH: How?

FBF: Oh—and I was flattering, but genuinely so because I’m obviously interested in his interests. I was calm, complimentary, and enthusiastic. So there was no fear, no fakery, and no manipulator’s guilt.

But the clincher was something else entirely, and it just dawned on me in the moment.

CSH: And that was …?

FBF: I told him he could speak with the cast Lynn [Hancock] and Joe [Cortese].

I told him I could call him back with Lynn [Hancock] or Joe [Cortese] on the line. I also told him I could arrange a conversation with Damien [Garofalo, son of the late Joseph who wrote the screenplay]. I gave him a chance to meet, verbally at least, his lifelong idols. He didn’t believe me, so I told him that we could use Skype and he could see the video.

So I called back on video conference with with Lynn. His response when he recognized her was classic. It was that line from [Carpenter’s] The Thing—“You’ve got to be fucking kidding.” His eyes welled up and he couldn’t speak.

CSH: I bet.

FBF told me that Saint agreed to sell the site for basically nothing. He even offered to integrate the old forum database into the new site to retain the fanbase.

So it looks like this will be the only article about COSOM on MapSelf for for now. You check out their new home here:

Visit COSOM Online at Evilspeak.org